Are we even sure that Sisyphus can make it to either location? Because in order to reach a destination he must first make it to the halfway point, right? But to make it there, he’s gotta make it to that point’s halfway point, but before he gets there he need to…

Libgen got me through undergrad

Orange for me

Who smudged the dirt docs?

Why is anyone using X in 2024?

This is hilarious. If I had some spare cash (and a lot of spare time), I’d absolutely love to do something like this. I’d love to do some modern blockbuster movies.

Removed by mod

H-how much milkshake were you drinking originally??? My annual milkshake consumption totals maybe 500 calories per year

My man, I think Germany has been through some leadership changes between now and 1939.

A proper SUV would probably be the better option here. How much lifetime waste do you think is generated through those constant AWD, unreliable, unrepairable, plastic unibody POSs versus a 2WD parts-swappable SUV?

SUV?

Unibody

IFS

Usually 2WD, sometimes AWD

Five pillows and a police lock

Data harvesting. How many people just click “Accept” for every permission an app wants? It doesn’t matter if the people never open it or delete it right away, it only takes seconds for the app to scan all that data and send it off once it has access.

I am NOT joking. This is serious shit, I almost puked because my toots smell so bad. Listen, I’m not a psychopath. I just needed to use up some onions. In my defense, I had some steak with it too. Steak and onions, not a bad combo right? I flew too close to the sun. Too many onions.

I made the mistake of sitting on the couch and farting, now the place where I sat reeks to high hell. I’m surprised I didn’t melt a hole through the fabric. I’ve been trying to fart outside on my balcony to keep from just blowing shit Febreeze in my flat. Now I’m sitting in my office chair and trying not to gag. I’m not squeamish, especially not with my own farts. This is different. Too many onions.

My whole apartment smells like a cross between an outhouse and a paper mill with a dash of rotten egg and diarrhea sprinkles. Why did I do this to myself?? I was a fool. Nay, I am a fool. I don’t even want to think about the torrent of ass lava that I’ll be subjected to tomorrow morning. I’m going to have animal control at my door thinking a family of possums died in the vents. How will I be able to tell my girlfriend that I can’t come see her because I have putrid onion gas? This is a lamentable misstep on my part, I ate God’s ass apple and now I’m paying the poo poo price. Too many onions.

UPDATE: As predicted, I did a world-ending dump that left my legs trembling and gave me what I can only describe as “the schwetts” (shit sweats). It wouldn’t be an exaggeration to say that the malignant stench my shit left is clinging to the walls like cigar smoke, except the cigar is just a turd. I was naive enough to leave my hand towel in the bathroom while I did the dark deed and it will now need to be burned, it absorbed the ass fumes like a greedy little sponge. Evacuating this demon crap from my body tired me out to the point of needing a nap afterwards. I’ll be getting in touch with a local priest in hopes of getting my shitter blessed. I looked into the eyes of god and found only poo. Hell is real and it can be purchased for about $1.25 per pound

Certain-Dri antiperspirant + Georgio Armani Profumo is the winning combo

Laziness and/or sometimes genuine medical needs

Why are you a pedophile?

I’m not? This question should really have a preface to it

My man, you almost KO’d because you took 7 big hits of a vasoconstrictor, which is entirely on you for misusing the drug.

This is similar to drowning someone in a vat of vodka and asking ‘how can alcohol be legal??’

help! I abused this drug and had a bad reaction how is this legal?!

This post (assuming it isn’t bait) reminds me exactly of that meme with the guy throwing a stick through the spokes of their bike