Wait until you find some nerd using SAS.
My day job uses SAS but I’ve used Stata and SPSS pretty extensively. SPSS is the most black-boxy out of all of them, but it’s also easiest to use. I see why it’s so popular in behavioral science; the math-heavy types tend not to go into psychology and similar.
The first time I learned about this as a wee lad, I was genuinely Concerned